For a man of few words, here are a few words for the man…
Dapper-like the Don Draper of the new millennium. As the financial world he works in gets more casual by the year, my dad still insists on wearing a suit and tie to work every day. Casual Fridays are a sin. My dad has a weekend “uniform”. Nantucket red shorts and an awesome random t-shirt that he has picked up along his travels with my mom. He accessorizes with his grey New Balance 990s and of course, Ray-Ban aviators. A spritz of Aramis cologne, and he is ready to take on the world.
Cool– I mean, driving around in his Mini-Cooper with the top down wearing the aforementioned Ray-Bans, can you THINK of a cooler guy?! My dad likes indigenous beer. Whenever we are away, he solely drinks the native brew. He listens to great music. I actually thank (and blame) my dad for my penchant for classic rock. On long car family car rides, I don’t remember listening to Disney music or Rafi after the first 30 minutes. We listened to The Cars, Huey Lewis and the News, and the 104.3 “Classics Countdown”. I make fun of my friends for going to see Phish every night when they are in NYC for 4 nights, but when my dad does the same thing every March when the Allman Brothers play the Beacon Theater, I think it is the pinnacle of cool dad (and I even tagged along once). And my dad went to camp, my camp. No need to further explain how this sky rockets him up the cool scale.
Creature of Habit- If the world were to stop evolving, I think my dad would be okay with it. Actually, if it stopped evolving 10 years ago he would have been MORE than okay. He does not need technology. He’s had a Blackberry for years, but still hasn’t mastered the art of BBMing. If my dad has something to say to you, he’ll call. And he does NOT believe in GPS. I think the only reason we have it in our current car is because it was an automatic feature. I can’t imagine my dad even bothered learning how to operate it. Where ever he is going, he knows how to get there. I can guarantee that every time I take a picture with my dad, he has to make himself laugh. EVERY SINGLE TIME. The culinary world has grown leaps and bounds over the years, but my dad is still happy with having Cheerios for breakfast, pb&j with Fritos for lunch, and a hot dog & a beer for dinner. And if I wander into the kitchen late at night? I know I can find my dad sitting by the light of the television dunking Oreos in milk in his terrycloth bathrobe. At our beach house I know if I can’t find my dad, he is most likely sitting outside on a lounge chair in lacrosse shorts with a Rolling Rock (his beer of choice).
Celebrity – And this is not just because he looks like Sam Waterston (and according to my mom, Adrien Brody in his younger years). It seems EVERYONE knows my dad, or at least of him. One thing my dad never has to worry about is people forgetting they had met him before (one of my ultimate pet peeves). I don’t know what it is, but people get excited when they know my dad is coming around. He has a few signature moves and phrases that keep him in the “Brilliant Highbrow” quadrant of the NY Magazine Approval Matrix. He uses terms like “good fun”, “forward moving motion”, and “ascertain the situation” which are both mind blowing and genius all at the same time. He dances the “Dave Rave”, which is a modified version of the Electric Slide. And then he has his wave-aptly named “The DavidRobin Wave”. This wave, this GLORIOUS wave, will ensure no one will ever miss him. He stiffly extends his right arm straight into the air, holds his hand up so that all five fingers are spread as far apart as possible, and quickly shakes his hand using a quick side to side motion whilst his arm is still reaching as high as he can get it. Believe me, he has never lost anyone in a crowd before. This is going to become a world wide phenomenon-if it hasn’t already.
Ladies Man– And not what you are thinking. I actually don’t know if my dad is that type of “ladies man”. He’s been with my mom since they went to SLEEP AWAY CAMP, so he doesn’t have much of a history with the ladies. What I do mean is that my dad, after living in a female dominated household for 30+ years, can pretty much successfully navigate his way through any situation the women in his life throw his way. My dad doesn’t yell. When there is a problem he will talk firmly in a very level voice (as to not add any additional tears to the conversation) and try to “ascertain the situation”. My dad keeps up with the Kardashians and dances with the stars. He may not remember every friends’ name, but he’s happy to sit and gossip about them at the dinner table. And no man, I mean NO MAN, looks as good carrying a black Longchamp travel bag through Newark Airport than my dad.
The one downside to my dad is that he has set the bar so INCREDIBLY high, that it is going to be virtually impossible to find a guy as great as him. I guess for a dad of 2 daughters, that was his exact plan! Thanks for being you, Dad. Happy Fathers Day.