T-Minus 30

Holy sh*tballs!! We are in the home stretch people!! Only 30 more days until I am 30 years old.  Thirty.  How did this happen? How are we here already? How fast did this year go?!

Last year at this time I was prepping for a work event at the Sundance Film Festival in Park City as well as preparing to work at the Super Bowl in Dallas.  Two events I had never been to and both required about 2000% of my attention. I was a package of stress and anxiety wrapped up in a pretty bow of fear.  I ran on manic bursts of energy that would end in a puddle of tears.  Awesome. Clearly I wasn’t my best self, but I was employed, busy, and not to mention in a relationship-so I thought I was on the right life path.  Welp, let’s fast forward 365 days to today.  I am unemployed, single, and my blackberry calendar is unfortunately not filled with the star studded events of yesteryear. Boy, has my life path taken an unexpected detour or what?!

I thought I needed all of these things that defined me.  I was an “event coordinator” and a “girlfriend” and a “total wackjob”.  I spent all day every day worrying about everyone else but myself.  From being overly obsessed with choosing the correct linens for a client welcome dinner to painstakingly trying to execute perfectly timed airport pick-ups to trying to find spare time to spend with my boyfriend there was ZERO time spent thinking about myself.  I became bitchy (well more bitchy than normal), irritable, tired, and 10lbs heavier than I wanted to be.  Bad news bears.

Now, remember when I was laid off in July and people said it was a blessing in disguise?! Well now I can certainly say it has been. I’ve had 6 months to do a little “road work” on my life path.  Instead of being concerned with what everyone else needs-I have finally been able to focus on myself.  I used to think that it was selfish to put myself first.  Now I think it is thebomb.com.  I do what makes ME happy.  I’m doing more cooking. I’m seeing my friends more often.  I’m getting back to the gym. I’m blogging.  I’m honing in on what I truly want from a career.  I’m laughing…a lot.  I’m learning what it takes to take care of me!

So now, here I am.  30 days left in my 20s and feeling pretty fabulous about it AND myself. Not saying everyone should up and leave their current jobs or relationships -but I would highly recommend trying to find your best self.  Everything DOES, in fact, happen for a reason.  I think the construction on this part of my life path is complete.  It’s time to take down the detour signs, head off the service roads, and drive straight on.  Exit 30 here I come!!

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One response to “T-Minus 30

  • Susan Stein

    rebecca, it is hard to believe that thirty years ago your mother cancelled our movie date to give birth to you!! You were the first baby we had and oh what a joy…living in the Heights…we were hip then…navigating raising a child…what the hell did we know…it really does take a village…so I would like to think I had some hand in the fabu woman you have become…but alas, it is not to be,,,it is your own hard work and humor that has gotten you to this milestone…keep writing and taking care of yourself…xoxoxo Aunt suz

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